#SELFIE the song: A snapshot or satire?

Well, of course a song about selfies has gone viral.

We at the antiselfie are digging the beat (sampled from Korean pop superstar Psy, apparently) but it looks like not everyone is loving the song’s message.

Which is simply, let me take a selfie because it’s all about me.

Some select juicy comments from youtube:

“I feel like people are taking this song at face value when it really is just making fun of all the ignorant people out there who abuse social media and upload selfies of themselves all the time. To those people, I say, please stop and let’s all cleanse the gene pool.”

“How is this even a song?”

“Perfect example why I hate this generation .”

“LOOK HERE! HE HATES THIS GENERATION! LOOK! See? Nobody cares.”

“You do realize this song is a form of satire right? Though people act like this anyway.”

“2014….Chicks are actually like this. Dudes too. Mankind is doomed.”

“This song is not here to make a big hit or win any music awards. It’s just to bring amusement to us lol”

“I admit that the beat is catchy and all. But this song is honestly terrible. it just shows how airheaded and shallow people of this generation are. Couldn’t they make a song about world hunger, or peace, or something actually relevant? no, they made a song about taking selfies. Is this really what music has come to? The future is indeed bright.”

“It’s supposed to be a joke. It isn’t serious. The way you think, I’m guessing you don’t have much fun.”

“What has the world come to?!?”

“I would watch the entire video but first……LET ME TAKE A SELFIE :)”

The antiselfie says, yeah, me too. Let me take a selfie. Once in a while. Not too much though.

Because it looks like a lot of people do realize that constant selfie-taking and posting is just plain annoying.

What about you? Do you find this song funny or annoying? Why?

Selfie addiction drives teen-ager close to suicide: “It can happen to anyone.”~Danny Bowman

Think that selfie addiction is harmless? Think again.

Nineteen-year-old Danny Bowman took about 200 selfies of himself a day to capture the perfect shot. Thinking he was failing to look good enough to post online, he almost killed himself.

Bowman, a 19-year-old Englishman had been diagnosed with body dysmorphic disorder and obsessive compulsive disorder, reported the Mirror News.

“Danny’s case is particularly extreme,” said psychiatrist Dr. David Veale, whose clinic helped treat the teenager.

“But this is a serious problem. It’s not a vanity issue. It’s a mental health one which has an extremely high suicide rate.”

Just like crack, alcohol, porn, sex, food, selfie-taking combined with social media can make for a mind-distorting state.

In Bowman’s case, selfie-taking and social media-posting became the outlet for his obsessive compulsive behavior.

“With modern technology, it can actually be quite severe,” Bowman says in the video. “This kind of thing can happen to anyone.”

Have you ever caught yourself in the grip of any behavior that makes you feel addicted to something: pot, alcohol, porn, sex, food, selfies? How does it feel? Do you feel the almost uncontrollable desire?

Try riding out that feeling of being “driven” to satisfy the craving. Instead of acting to trigger the addiction (i.e. taking a selfie, walking to the fridge, going online, the liquor store, the pot dealer, buying cigarettes), just sit still and breathe for about five minutes, and focus on breath. This method can allow compulsion to subside.

Mindfulness meditation is just one of many tools to get over an addiction. Consult a professional.

More coverage on Bowman:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/03/25/selfie-addiction-mental-illness_n_5022090.html?ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000063

More on addictive behavior:
“To know yourself is to forget yourself, and he didn’t mean take another selfie.”
https://theantiselfie.wordpress.com/wp-admin/post.php?post=778&action=edit

7 ways to know if your Facebook friend is a real friend

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images These days, everyone’s a “friend.” Meet me on tinder, okcupid, grindr, craigslist then add me on facebook, twitter, instagram, snapchat, and we’re friends? Yeah! Never met them except online? Friends. Talked on Facetime? Friends. Hooking up? Friends. Just for sex? Friends. Following them on Twitter? Friends.

Marketing and a culture of ambivalence have twisted the word “friend” beyond recognition. No wonder most of these pseudo- quasi- “friendships” can leave you empty, sad and feeling even more alone than ever.

If you’re hard-pressed to define what a friend really is, here’s a handy guide straight from the Buddha. Italicized texts are from Buddha, followed by commentary that’s strictly the antiselfie’s only.

A friend endowed with seven qualities is worth associating with. Which seven?

1. He gives what is hard to give. One of the toughest things to give people these days is time. Does the other person carve out time for you just so you can be in each other’s company (not just for sex, or to vent their latest problem)? Do they actually make plans with you, or just seem to conveniently call and ask you to come over late at night, when the mood strikes (hint: booty call) or only when they need your help?

2.She does what is hard to do. So you hang out and have fun and get drinks. Great. Anyone can do that. How about for the time you need to be told (kindly) that you’re making a mess of your life, while he helps clean up the mess?

3. He endures what is hard to endure. You’re talking about the same issue over and over again. Yup, your real friend is still listening.

4. She reveals her secrets to you.  And the secret is really scary dark.

5. He keeps your secrets. Or is telling this person a secret kind of like posting a video on youtube and it went viral?

6. When misfortunes strike, she doesn’t abandon you. Is your friend still there when you’re broke/jobless? And out to help you in some way?

7. When you’re down & out, he doesn’t look down on you. Does your friend make fun of you, talk about you behind your back, or hold you up as a pitiful thing (sort of to make herself look better)? Or does she help you keep your dignity intact in tough times?

A friend endowed with these seven qualities is worth associating with.

Notice this sentence. It means some people are NOT worth associating with.

Another gem from Buddha:

If a traveler does not meet with one who is better or equal, let one firmly travel alone; there is no companionship with a fool.

The antiselfie’s take: No friend is better than a bad friend. Plus, you deserve better, or at least, equal.

The Buddha isn’t telling you to turn the unworthy into your enemies.

He’s just telling you to wisely keep yourself protected from the not-so-great friends, know that they’re not the best company, and to keep them on a need-to-know basis. Be selective!

Sadly, fake friends are really not good for you, either because they are bad for your mental and emotional health, or they drag you down, or both.

Can you tell which of your friends are the real thing? Have you ever needed to dissociate from certain friends because they were toxic? Try surrounding yourself with good, authentic people. Compare and contrast the feelings you have around true friends and not-so-true friends. With whom are you at ease?

– See more at: http://ultraculture.org/blog/2014/01/07/7-qualities-look-friend-according-buddha/#sthash.UJwnq2Ka.dpuf

Rockstar Nun hopes to get people to church: “I came here because I have a gift and I want to share that gift.” ~ Singing Nun Sister Cristina Scuccia

Whoa! Trending worldwide is a Catholic nun who brought her faith to center stage–the stage of the reality singing contest “The Voice” in Italy.

Sister Cristina Scuccia, 25, belted out Alicia Keys’ “No One” and had the studio audience on its feet.

“Yes, I am truly, truly, a sister,” she told the judges, who were equal parts delighted and shocked.

“I came here because I have a gift and I want to share that gift. I am here to evangelize,” she said, reports Catholic News Agency.

“If I had found you at Mass I would always be in church,” said one of the judges, Italian rapper J-Ax. Which is exactly Scuccia’s point.

Scuccia also said that she now hopes her boss, Pope Francis, will call her.

The antiselfie thinks this isn’t just a cute story.

The antiselfie hopes that Sister Cristina will send the message that being nice, kind and of service to others, is actually the ULTIMATE cool!

Just check out the coolness of the Dalai Lama, Pope Francis.

What’s cooler–being self-centered, or being compassionate and kind?

“Meditation is going to be the next treadmill.” – Dan Harris

Bold statement, but actually, already happening.

Mainstream anchor, ABC’s Dan Harris has been all over the place promoting his new book “10 Percent Happier: How I Tamed the Voice in My Head, Reduced Stress Without Losing My Edge, and Found Self-Help That Actually Works–A True Story.”

The antiselfie hasn’t actually read Harris’ book, but from what we’ve gleaned from his interviews, it sounds like Harris is fast becoming meditation’s ambassador to the non-new agey, non-incense-burning, non tie-dye wearing, non kombucha-drinking, non ohm-chanting, non-spiritual tattoo-having, non yoga-doing population.

By the way, before any of you get offended, full disclosure: the antiselfie does burn incense, have various spiritual practices, and will bust out an ohm or whatever chant, when the occasion calls for it.

But we’re also aware enough to realize that from a regular Joe’s perspective, these things can make one look absolutely ridiculous and airy-fairy.

The antiselfie is also very much aware of Harris’ somewhat self-conscious shunning of the above practices because it might, after all, affect his credibility as a journalist losing that hard, objective mind that wants “Just the facts, ma’am.”

Yes, the antiselfie gets it, because we too, are from Harris’ industry.

Harris’ journey began when he had a panic attack while reading the news, and yes, it wasn’t pretty. He believes it was his use of drugs to drive away depression that led to the on-air anxiety attack.

It appears from his Nightline piece that he may have also suffered some unprocessed post traumatic stress due to his exposure to war zones as a reporter.

He eventually discovered meditation, after reporting on all the gurus who didn’t make sense to him. Fair enough–not many get it on the first try.

We do appreciate Harris’ clear and yet non-fanatical-sounding discussion of meditation, even if he is, clearly, a fan.

Harris says:

“Meditation suffers from a towering PR problem, largely because its most prominent proponents talk as if they have a perpetual pan flute accompaniment.

Harris adds: “If you can get past the cultural baggage, though, what you’ll find is that meditation is simply exercise for your brain.” (Hence the quote “Meditation is going to be the next treadmill.”)

“It’s a proven technique for preventing the voice in your head from leading you around by the nose.

“To be clear, it’s not a miracle cure. It won’t make you taller or better-looking, nor will it magically solve all of your problems.

“You should disregard the fancy books and the famous gurus promising immediate enlightenment.

“In my experience, meditation makes you 10% happier. That’s an absurdly unscientific estimate, of course. But still, not a bad return on investment.”

In his Nightline piece, Harris drills down the process of meditation to three practical steps:

1. Sit down with a straight back
2. Feel your breath
3. Return to the breath when your mind goes elsewhere.

Minus all the bells, gongs and robes, Harris gets it.

With the way Harris is promoting meditation, the antiselfie makes a fearless statement:

Dan Harris has already become a guru. And we couldn’t be happier for him!

Maybe he’s just in denial about it at the moment?

But of course, with a little more meditation, he might start admitting it, even if just to himself. And be less afraid of it.

See Harris’ Nightline piece on meditation. (Which some of us might call a “Way Seeking Mind Talk” 😉 )